Learning is Work
Learning is work
Yes, learning is work. But it is leisurely work. It is the kind of work that can be savored and enjoyed most of the time. It is the kind of work that can be accomplished through play.
Sure there will be occasional times of frustration when a child does not understand something or remember something as quickly or easily as they would like. But that is just a small annoyance against the beautiful backdrop that is school.
Now, you may be thinking I am a pontificating crazy lady. School isn't beautiful, you argue.
Ah, but that is your first mistake. Because schooling ought to be beautiful. Because you are the leader of your homeschool you have no one, no thing, and no system to blame if your school is not beautiful. Of, course, you can blame the curriculum. You can blame it for having an unrealistic schedule. You can blame it for not being fun or beautiful. You can blame it, in fact, for all of your homeschooling problems.
But switching curriculum seldom solves all your homeschooling problems. Nor does dumping the school out of your homeschool.
You don't have to take the school out of your homeschool to make learning beautiful
Some people say that the home part of homeschool is more important than the school part. Some people even wish we could dispose of the term homeschool because learning at home has such little resemblance to what the modern world knows as school.
But I say we keep the word. Not only that, we transform the word. This transformation requires we step back in time and look at the origins of this word.
School is from the Latin word schole, which means leisure. School means leisure. Let's just forget for a moment about the images that pop into our minds when we imagine school. Forget the desks and chairs. Forget the buildings. Forget the textbooks and backpacks and math test.
Just try for a moment to think about leisure. What does a person do when they are not busy surviving? Because this is what leisure is, it is the things you do when your shelter, food, and clothing are adequate. Once you know you are safe. You probably won't die and your loved ones won't starve to death in the next week. You stop. You sit down. You contemplate. You think. You might putter around with tools, craft something beautiful. Play. This is leisure. This is school. School is leisure.
Let's focus, as we think about how to tame that curriculum, on this concept. School is the playful part of life. The relaxing part. The part you do because you have everything you need. The thing you are grateful for because it is so precious and beautiful.
Now, look at that curriculum with this in mind.
There are many ways in which leisure, learning, and play are obviously linked. For example, reading a great story aloud to your kids. A trip to the zoo. Baking anything.
Yes, some academic subjects require us to sit with a book of some sort and concentrate, and work out some problems or answer some questions. But that does not mean that those things too, should not be done in an interesting, engaging, leisurely way.
The first thing to look at in your curriculum is the thing you (the teacher) hate doing the most. Why? Is it just boring? Is it ugly? Is it presented poorly? (Let's not pretend curriculum writers are cognitive learning experts.) Is inaccurate? Is it dry? Is it overly repetitious? Is it talking down to your kid like they are a dog? Is it too complicated? It is making the subject harder to understand? (Let's not pretend curriculum writers are always simple and direct in their writing.) Is it biased? Full of opinions? Scanty on facts? Not encouraging kids to think? One-sided?
Root out why you hate it. It may turn out that you just need to come to it with a leisurely attitude instead of a 'let's get this learning over with' attitude. But it could also just be a bad resource. It could simply be that there are too many working parts and you just need to throw out a few of those extra screws to get the engine running smoothly. (Let's not pretend that curriculum writers always test their assignments and real, live, children and know how long all those pieces will take.) It could be good and beautiful, but also complex enough that just doing it 10 minutes a day is creating too much choppiness. Maybe that part needs to be done once a week in a 50-minute session to increase comprehension.
Fix that one piece you hate. Make a tweak and try it for a week. If that did not help, try another tweak. Just to that one part that you hate the most. On the day that you longer feel like an aluminum can being stomped on when it is time to do subject, you know you won. You can move on to the next essential piece.
The piece your child hates, or cries about, or swears on fudge that it is just too hard.
(Why didn't we do this part first? Cause, teacher, your attitude is magic. You've got to get that piece in order first. You have to wake up every day being grateful and glad that you get to do this amazing leisurely school-play thing with your kids every day.)
Now, your kid cannot learn if they are emotionally upset. They will be upset if they are stressed. They will be stressed if they are forced to do work that is either too hard or too easy. Believe it or not, kids don't always know the difference. They can be crying 'too hard' when the problem, is really that it is too easy. Because it is too easy they are bored. And because they are bored it seems hard.
Don't make your kids slog through concepts they already know. Add juice, inspiration, or complexity to the study. Even if it takes more time. Even if it means that you can't do 7 subjects every day. Even if it means they understand things they don't need to know for another 5 years.
Sometimes it is too hard because traditional school work requires a certain set of skills. It could be that writing out the answers to the science questions is too hard because your child's composition skills are behind their scientific understanding. They can't articulate what they know. And when they try they just turn into an emotional puddle because they know it isn't right. Or they just write the least amount possible, because they know they can write, 'water is wet' correctly and they know they don't know how to spell 'hydrogen' so they leave out the more interesting things about water.
That is normal. Kids doing the minimum expected of them is normal. Kids having trouble with one piece of an assignment is normal. They are not skilled at using all their academic skills at the same time. They are still learning many academic skills.
So step two to taming that box is to tweak the thing that is sending your kid running.
Of course, there is an exception to this. Every kid needs to do hard things. Doing hard things is how you develop a growth mindset. You have to hit a wall, be sure you can't get it, and persist until you do get it. That is the only way to really have a growth mindset. You have to prove it to yourself with action. And kids need us, parents, to make sure they get that chance.
The only problem is, you just can't get it done.ng curriculum seldom solves all your homeschooling problems. Nor does dumping the school out of your homeschool.
You don't have to take the school out of your homeschool to make learning beautiful
Some people say that the home part of homeschool is more important than the school part. Some people even wish we could dispose of the term homeschool because learning at home has such little resemblance to what the modern world knows as school.
But I say we keep the word. Not only that, we transform the word. This transformation requires we step back in time and look at the origins of this word.
School is from the Latin word schole, which means leisure. School means leisure. Let's just forget for a moment about the images that pop into our minds when we imagine school. Forget the desks and chairs. Forget the buildings. Forget the textbooks and backpacks and math test.
Just try for a moment to think about leisure. What does a person do when they are not busy surviving? Because this is what leisure is, it is the things you do when your shelter, food, and clothing are adequate. Once you know you are safe. You probably won't die and your loved ones won't starve to death in the next week. You stop. You sit down. You contemplate. You think. You might putter around with tools, craft something beautiful. Play. This is leisure. This is school. School is leisure.
Let's focus, as we think about how to tame that curriculum, on this concept. School is the playful part of life. The relaxing part. The part you do because you have everything you need. The thing you are grateful for because it is so precious and beautiful.
Now, look at that curriculum with this in mind.
There are many ways in which leisure, learning, and play are obviously linked. For example, reading a great story aloud to your kids. A trip to the zoo. Baking anything.
Yes, some academic subjects require us to sit with a book of some sort and concentrate, and work out some problems or answer some questions. But that does not mean that those things too, should not be done in an interesting, engaging, leisurely way.
The first thing to look at in your curriculum is the thing you (the teacher) hate doing the most. Why? Is it just boring? Is it ugly? Is it presented poorly? (Let's not pretend curriculum writers are cognitive learning experts.) Is inaccurate? Is it dry? Is it overly repetitious? Is it talking down to your kid like they are a dog? Is it too complicated? It is making the subject harder to understand? (Let's not pretend curriculum writers are always simple and direct in their writing.) Is it biased? Full of opinions? Scanty on facts? Not encouraging kids to think? One-sided?
Root out why you hate it. It may turn out that you just need to come to it with a leisurely attitude instead of a 'let's get this learning over with' attitude. But it could also just be a bad resource. It could simply be that there are too many working parts and you just need to throw out a few of those extra screws to get the engine running smoothly. (Let's not pretend that curriculum writers always test their assignments and real, live, children and know how long all those pieces will take.) It could be good and beautiful, but also complex enough that just doing it 10 minutes a day is creating too much choppiness. Maybe that part needs to be done once a week in a 50-minute session to increase comprehension.
Fix that one piece you hate. Make a tweak and try it for a week. If that did not help, try another tweak. Just to that one part that you hate the most. On the day that you longer feel like an aluminum can being stomped on when it is time to do subject, you know you won. You can move on to the next essential piece.
The piece your child hates, or cries about, or swears on fudge that it is just too hard.
(Why didn't we do this part first? Cause, teacher, your attitude is magic. You've got to get that piece in order first. You have to wake up every day being grateful and glad that you get to do this amazing leisurely school-play thing with your kids every day.)
Now, your kid cannot learn if they are emotionally upset. They will be upset if they are stressed. They will be stressed if they are forced to do work that is either too hard or too easy. Believe it or not, kids don't always know the difference. They can be crying 'too hard' when the problem, is really that it is too easy. Because it is too easy they are bored. And because they are bored it seems hard.
Don't make your kids slog through concepts they already know. Add juice, inspiration, or complexity to the study. Even if it takes more time. Even if it means that you can't do 7 subjects every day. Even if it means they understand things they don't need to know for another 5 years.
Sometimes it is too hard because traditional school work requires a certain set of skills. It could be that writing out the answers to the science questions is too hard because your child's composition skills are behind their scientific understanding. They can't articulate what they know. And when they try they just turn into an emotional puddle because they know it isn't right. Or they just write the least amount possible, because they know they can write, 'water is wet' correctly and they know they don't know how to spell 'hydrogen' so they leave out the more interesting things about water.
That is normal. Kids doing the minimum expected of them is normal. Kids having trouble with one piece of an assignment is normal. They are not skilled at using all their academic skills at the same time. They are still learning many academic skills.
If they have to think about how to shape a letter or spell a word, that is a cognitive load. That means their working memory, the one that solves problems and creates stuff, is already busy with these details. It means there is not as much room left over for problem solving or creative thinking.
What might look like a simple assignment to us can be very complex to a child.
Don't be afraid to disrupt which skills are used for your child to complete an assignment.
For example, written work. The curriculum usually asks a child to answer questions in writing much too soon and much too often. This is a matter of convenience for the teacher, who can then assess which children know what. But it is much better for the young child to answer questions verbally, where they can get immediate feedback and engage in conversation.
Of course they need to practice the skill of writing. But we forget just how complex that skill is and we rush the process. Guess what? Whether your child can write a paragraph at 7 or 12 doesn't affect their college essay. Writing is mostly about thinking and we are wasting our time letting our kids think without us. Because we can ask them questions that make them think deeper, harder, or in new ways. We can challenge them. And they will love it. Because conversation is bonding, and because kids love puzzles. When we push them to think in new ways it is a new puzzle for them to explore.
Occasionally you will find a curriculum that does this pushing with its carefully crafted questions. If your child is old enough that they can write out their complex thoughts to these questions, you can let them, otherwise, you should be letting them talk to you about it.
You might be surprised at how much less time it takes when you switch to verbal answers. You may also be amazed at how much more your child seems to be retaining and learning. It is because connection with the teaching matters more than almost anything else in the learning process. And it is because their working memory is no longer overloaded with the mundane tasks of remembering which way the 'p' faces and how to spell 'because'.
I'm not saying you don't need to work on those mundane tasks. But they are best concentrated on in other ways. Work on the skills, every day, in short bursts. But don't hold your child's learning back just because they lack a few skills. Let them blossom and move forward in content whether or not they can spell 'hydrogen' for the test.
Let them prove and express their learning to you with the tools they currently know how to use. That might mean you get to practice listening.
So step two to taming that box is to tweak the thing that is sending your kid running.
Of course, there is an exception to this. Every kid needs to do hard things. Doing hard things is how you develop a growth mindset. You have to hit a wall, be sure you can't get it, and persist until you do get it. That is the only way to really have a growth mindset. You have to prove it to yourself with action. And kids need us, parents, to make sure they get that chance.
Sometimes your kids tears might just be because they are challenged. They are doubting themselves. The material is hard and they don't know if they will ever understand. In their hearts, they are afraid they might be stupid. You have to prove their smartness to them by not letting them give-up. This is not a short-term quick fix. And you don't have to make every subject challenge them at this level. Just one thing is enough to teach them this lesson. But it is likely to take several years. Eventually what is hard now will seem easy
Sometimes your kids tears might just be because they are challenged. They are doubting themselves. The material is hard and they don't know if they will ever understand. In their hearts, they are afraid they might be stupid. You have to prove their smartness to them by not letting them give-up. This is not a short-term quick fix. And you don't have to make every subject challenge them at this level. Just one thing is enough to teach them this lesson. But it is likely to take several years. Eventually what is hard now will seem easy